I was looking in the local Yellow Pages today for something that starts with the letter E (we’ll say … enema discount services) when I came across the Escort section.

Okay I know we have all seen this section and some of us have possibly even pranked called a few. Not me, of course … that’s just wrong. But I think I have found a new little “quirk” about me. Whenever I am in a new city I like to read the escort pages and see what type of ridiculous advertisements they have. It’s not weird, I swear. …continue reading This is more sad than it is funny

I am stressed out here people. Things in my world have been turned upside-down.

I went on the record a little while back…saying that Scientists needed to get their shit together and keep our group of planets tight…and not be letting any rifraff in (asteroids, moons, my ego etc.). So what do they decide to do? They kick pluto right the fuck OUT of the solar system!

What a bunch of douchebags!

They’re all “Pluto is an Icy Dwarf…not a planet…not anymore”.

Tell that to my now-inaccurate lunchbox (comeplete with thermos) jackasses. I will now have to put black electrical tape over Pluto.

…continue reading From Hero To Zero